| [Arzner paces before a camera. Lindstrom and Oberon rehearse a kiss scene over and over. They are dressed in military costume.] | |
| ARZNER: | [bending to look in her lens] No, higher. I can see up Miss Oberons nose. Stop. [to Lindstrom] Take your bottom lip, pull it out no, like this [she demonstrates] and glide the inside of your lip just under the bottom of her lip no, no. Miss Lindstrom, would you come here please? [motions Lindstrom over] Do as I do. [demonstrates kiss on Lindstrom] |
| LINDSTROM: | Youll pardon me, Miss Arzner, but Ive been kissed better by horses. |
| ARZNER: | [guiding Lindstrom to view scene through camera lens] Watch. [approaches Oberon, gives her a long, passionate kiss while Lindstrom watches] A kiss that feels good rarely looks good. |
| OBERON: | [flustered] Its like buying shoes. |
| ARZNER: | Lets take five minutes, shall we? [into megaphone] Five-minute break! |
| [Lindstrom exits.] | |
| OBERON: | What did Cohn say? |
| ARZNER: | [unbuttoning Oberons blouse] Shhh. Not now. Not now. |
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| OBERON: | When? |
| ARZNER: | Youre shaking |
| OBERON: | I suspect I like you too much. |
| ARZNER: | [nuzzling Oberon] Courage, courage. |
| OBERON: | What did Cohn tell you? |
| ARZNER: | Harry told me I should take you behind the prop house and [whispers rest into her ear] |
| OBERON: | Now that I believe! |
| ARZNER: | [places Oberon on her lap] Hmmm I want a whole face of kisses. |
| OBERON: | [unbuttons her blouse, offers Arzner her breasts] Are you sure no one is watching? |
| ARZNER: | [laughing, fondling] Youre cute when youre demure. |
| OBERON: | Im cute all the time. Dorothy, tell me what Cohn said annnnnd Ill kiss the pink parts inside you. Ill go so deep youll need a rope to pull me back. |
| ARZNER: | [kissing Oberons face] Hmmm I love a good magic trick. [turns camera on Merle as they kiss] Just relax, be natural. |
| OBERON: | [sees camera is on] Jesus Christ! Turn that cursed thing off! |
| ARZNER: | [pulls away] Shhh! |
| OBERON: | [pushes away, buttons up blouse clumsily] Really, darling, you know my motto natural acting is neither. What a nerve youve got. |
| ARZNER: | I seem to do better with women this big. [makes a small square with her fingers] Sorry, bad habit. |
| OBERON: | You are an odd creature. |
| ARZNER: | Youre so beautiful [laughs] when Im with you I have to prove Im real. |
| [Arzner tries to kiss and film Oberon again.] | |
| OBERON: | [pushing Arzner away] Youre real enough. Real trouble. [fusses with blouse] Oh, hell, look at me now what did Harry tell you? |
| ARZNER: | [angry, shuts off camera] Forget it. [into megaphone] Lets get back to work, people! |
| [Lindstrom returns, both stand before a white screen. Arzner faces them with a camera. Lindstroms face is traced by a blunt square of white light. Cohn enters, paces behind Arzner, anxiously watching the film shoot.] | |
| ARZNER: | Please turn to the left, I need to check the light levels. Now the right, please. Thank you. Any time you feel ready Action! |
| [Lindstrom and Oberon silently act out their kissing scene.] | |
| COHN: | [watching the scene] Dorothy, youre ruining me! What am I gonna tell the Catholic League for Decency? Today I produced a nice little patriotic film about two bull daggers whoring around the fields of France killing Nazis. Cut! |
| ARZNER: | Cut! Get me a longer boom, and sharpen the focus on Miss Oberons torso. Can we try to reduce the shine on Miss Lindstroms shoulders? Thank you. [whispers to Cohn] You are undermining my authority on the set. |
| COHN: | Youre goddamn right Im undermining your authority Im gonna bazooka your authority! Are you crazy? |
| ARZNER: | You dont understand feminine behaviour. |
| COHN: | Fine, then please translate for me do girls always kiss each other full on the mouth before they shoot Nazi collaborators? How come they dont do that in westerns? |
| ARZNER: | Well, these women are Europeans. [to Lindstrom and Oberon] Lets try the scene again, please. Miss Oberon, if you could place your left leg under your backside no, the knee should be more pronounced. [drags a boom mike over the scene] Lets have a sound check please, Miss Lindstrom. |
| LINDSTROM: | [acting scene, badly] Thats right, I said die die because I love you |
| ARZNER: | Thank you. [moves microphone] Again. [Lindstrom says line again, or shorter version of same] Stop. Perfect. [frames shot with a pocket lens] Miss Oberon, the knee? Silence please Action! |
| LINDSTROM: | [acting scene with Oberon] Thats right, I said die die because I love you. Remember me when the axe falls, remember that I love you. Ill swing for you, but Ill take the rope in both my hands and whisper your name. |
| COHN: | Get me the script girl! Script girl, I said! |
| ARZNER: | Cut! I need silence! Harry, its your money being wasted. |
| LINDSTROM: | Sorry. Was I outside my light again? |
| ARZNER: | No, Mr. Cohn was inside my ear. Take a few minutes and fix up your faces. [paces] Maybe the point of view is wrong. [to Cohn] What do you think speech, responding shot, speech or speech, speech, speech and then responding shot? |
| COHN: | [wiping face with handkerchief] Heres a responding shot I come in from behind the trees dressed like a Kraut and shoot the both of them dead. A perfectly noble ending! |
| OBERON: | Mr. Cohn, lets all settle down, shall we? Would you like some brandy? [snaps fingers at Lindstrom to get Cohn a drink; Lindstrom brings him a shot, he drinks it] Now, were all adults here. You have to forgive Dorothy shes Californian, she sometimes forgets to drive the speed limit. |
| COHN: | [puts down glass calmly] Dont smooth talk with me, Oberon. Ill eat your contract myself and shit it down your throat. |
| LINDSTROM: | Am I gonna have to learn new lines? |
| OBERON: | Now Harry, you know how I adore you. I love you so much that when I die I want my ashes spread across your driveway so your car wont skid. |
| COHN: | I doubt your corpse will burn so good. [wiping face] Dotty, listen to me one minute for a war picture Im telling you gotta give me something more conventional. |
| ARZNER: | You mean more dishonest. |
| COHN: | More like legal. |
| ARZNER: | If youd only let me show you what I intend |
| COHN: | Shut up with that you think maybe Im stupid? Dont forget who signs the cheques, Arzner. Ive burned films before. They glow real pretty, all blue like. |
| [Parsons enters, carrying a lunch bag.] | |
| COHN: | Oh joy. Hey, ace reporter, wheres my blindfold and last cigarette? |
| PARSONS: | My dear, all you ever have to do is ask. |
| ARZNER: | Places, ladies. |
| COHN: | Im gonna sit in my office for one hour and dream of a nice quick stroke. Then Im coming back, and everything will be just the way I want it. Or else I get ugly. |
| [Cohn exits. Oberon and Lindstrom reassemble on the set, trying to catch the conversation between Parsons and Arzner.] | |
| PARSONS: | I like the way Harry explodes. Like a Mexican birthday party. Have you ever seen a woman ball up her fists like that? No. Men smash, women cut. I prefer the smash so much more direct than journalism. |
| ARZNER: | [resets her camera while Oberon and Lindstrom wait for directions] Youll forgive me if I work. |
| PARSONS: | Were all working today, Dorothy. [tries to peek into Arzners camera] People say you have the tightest mouth in Hollywood. People say you wouldnt yell fire in Hades. |
| ARZNER: | I have a fear of redundancy, and newspapers. It amounts to the same thing. |
| PARSONS: | [with pencil and notepad] What is this final scene about, Dorothy? Dont you trust me? |
| ARZNER: | This film is about focusing and refocusing. Long shots and close-ups. This is a film about costumes and makeup and backlighting and set design and sound levels. I wish theyd lock the doors around here. |
| PARSONS: | Be careful, Dorothy, nobody in America roots for the clever girl. |
| ARZNER: | Then I am a failure as an American. I root for the clever girl. I guess its a psychological block, but it makes me happy. |
| PARSONS: | Now we are flying with the birds. Psychology! No filth blows out my umbrella more briskly than psychology! Lets you and I share an honest moment you dress like a baseball player and you make movies about confused women in long silver dresses. Where the hell were you brought up? |
| ARZNER: | This is a film about high contrasts. You see, in this scene Im using very high-powered lights [points to Parsonss face] to bleach out crows feet, shadows under the eyes. Like most pictures, this is a film about hairdressing and set decorating and props. |
| PARSONS: | Do I appear to be without the blessing of hearing? Am I speaking Spanish? You are too smart for my own good: talk to me, buttercream, before somebody else does. I need an angle for this story by this afternoon make sense now, before Harry takes all your pretty girls away. |
| ARZNER: | This is a film about two women bonding together during a time of international conflict. |
| PARSONS: | Try again, loverboy. |
| [Oberon and Lindstrom giggle nervously.] | |
| ARZNER: | [to Parsons] Damn you! Get off my set! |
| PARSONS: | Dorothy, heavens! Such language. |
| [Arzner swings the boom mike over Parsons head and shoves the microphone aggressively into Parsons face.] | |
| ARZNER: | [takes boom mike in hand] I invented this. The boom mike. My idea. Watch any talkie from 31 or 32. Youre old enough to remember nobody moves. All the actors are like chess pieces, frozen, waiting for their square to open up. Like you. I changed all that I let actors use their legs. The same way Im going to liberate you. |
| PARSONS: | Dont you dare lay a hand on me! |
| ARZNER: | [laughing] Look at you, youre frozen. Frozen in old stories and ancient scandals and the entire history of sexual intercourse in Southern California since 1900. Youre cornered. [takes Parsons by the arm] |
| PARSONS: | [prepares to defend herself] Miss Arzner, you are taxing my composure! |
| ARZNER: | Heres your chance to get out, heres your chance to write a real story, heres your ticket out from under the mattresses of teenage girls you have one chance to ask me one singularly adult, intelligent and useful question about the art of filmmaking. |
| PARSONS: | [into the microphone] Is it true Miss Oberon promised to do three pictures for free just to get out of this one? |
| OBERON: | Really! The only people I allow to lie to my face are royalty. |
| [Oberon exits in anger. Arzner turns the boom away from Parsons face, defeated.] | |
| PARSONS: | [looks into lens of Arzners camera] Am I in there too? Am I allowed in your privileged, highbrow world? I am a woman too why else would I watch? |
| ARZNER: | [shoves Parsons away from camera] This is my film, my eye youll watch, you always watch. Youre drawn to the light. |
| PARSONS: | Finish your thought, Dorothy. For once in your life finish an honest, clean sentence. Itll set you free. |
| ARZNER: | If I give you an honest answer, one of us will disappear. |
| PARSONS: | Shit on Sunday, Dorothy, Ill say it for you: this is a film about two girls fucking. Any poor fool can see that, and this poor fool can print it. |
| [Parsons exits.] | |
| ARZNER: | [to Lindstrom] Clear the set! |
| [Lindstrom exits. Arzner is left alone. She focuses and refocuses the camera obsessively, plays with the lights and microphones, paces.] | |
| ARZNER: | Nothing pleases them. Nothing. All these years, making movies to please people who dont know what they want. Im tired of it. Make it sexier, Dorothy. Dorothy, thats too racy. Your female characters are too mean, Dorothy. Dorothy, why dont you give these girls some spunk? Thats an odd camera angle, Dorothy, I cant see her tits. Dorothy, youve got your camera down her top. Dorothy, youre too highbrow. Dorothy, you are simplifying the story. Your films are too cold. Whoa, Dorothy, turn the heat down. Dorothy, your films are so poetic. Dorothy, if people want poetry, they buy a book. DAMN DAMN DAMN Nothing is ever enough, ever just right I have spent my entire career giving the least possible intellectual content to the most educated audience in the history of the world. All Ive got, everything inside me, I have given to people who cant remember the title of my films ten minutes after the credits. [pause] Not this time. One kiss. One kiss will forgive all the lies, clear off all the mud, the years and years of saying yes and meaning I hate you. One kiss will complete my open, cloudless blue sky of a movie. No winks, no layers, no hidden stories, no secret signals. One perfect, true film and I can start over. I can make honest movies, honest movies for discerning, mature audiences. One kiss, and this film is mine. |
| END |